in between...

I'm in between projects right now and thanks to the economy things are pretty slow, so I've found myself with an extra month between when I'd actually planned to slow down for the summer and when school gets out.

A normal person might be sort of excited about unforeseen time off. But since I have an insane and panicked reaction to unplanned events, I've been basically sitting on my deck in the warm sun, drinking iced tea and lemonade, connecting with people, sending out writing samples, and freaking out.

Until today. Because I had to stay home with Naomi who has some sort of ugly virus that I'm trying not to connect with anything porkish, I was forced to abandon the work part and just do the part where I sit in the sun drinking iced drinks and playing quietly with my girl. (Or rather, propping up Barbies on tiny Barbie stools over and over because they will not keep their skinny plastic bottoms on their seats.)

And I have to say that I think I may take this opportunity to get some of my own writing done, enjoy the rare Seattle sunshine, the time alone, and to maybe work on my patience and transition skills (funny how Tali and her Kindergarten peers and I are all working on the same things...). Also, the following ad below doesn't help me feel too encouraged:

----------------------
I will write your obituary. \
Location: Seattle
Compensation: $20 each
Principals only. Recruiters, please don't contact this job poster.
Please, no phone calls about this job!
Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.

---------------------------
Geez, at least the guy could've gotten the ad in the right section. I'm just looking at it as a sign to stop looking for the day....

sometimes it's just easier to write a note...

wordless wednesday...

barbies get new wheels for spring...

wordless wednesday...

a taste of spring...

Seattle was sunny this past weekend. It was notably lovely and everyone was out in their yards gardening and hanging out. We saw our neighbors again and people stopped by to just say hello. The whole weekend was downright neighborly.

Naomi and her friend, Sophie, played Barbie spa while I pulled so many weeds that I need to wait for the yard waste to be picked up before I keep going.

And on Saturday night, we headed to the Red Sox/Mariners game to watch our friend, Ari, throw the first pitch. Here he is (he's that little white blob on the pitcher's mound):

Unsure of who to root for, Samuel switched hats every inning, though when the Red Sox pulled ahead, he kept his Mariner's hat on for the rest of the game. You know, to support the underdog and all. But when I put on the Red Sox hat to go find our friends in their suite, Tali made me take it off. "Mom, you're embarrassing me!" Sigh... She needs to go hang out with the Boston contingent...

As you can see, Boaz and Naomi took the Mariner's loss much harder than Sam and Tali did...

We're back to rain this week, but hoping for some more sunny weather for the weekend!

there is a huge gaping hole in my blog...

I don’t write about my dear friend Josh’s cancer because in the past I’ve felt like it wasn’t my experience to write. He does an amazing job writing about it on his own blog and way too often I feel like there is no way I could capture the intensity of his and his family's situation with my second or third hand experience.

Except that there are times when I find that I don’t write about the happy or interesting things in my life because what I’m actually totally consumed with is how this vibrant and beautiful family that I love deeply is suffering so much. And so Josh's story becomes all of our stories, too. And in supporting my friends in the best way that I can, I am superbly pissed off at the situation.

As I wait for Josh and Kim to get back from their latest scan, I’m finding it impossible to think about anything else but them.

It is totally unfair that when their oldest son comes over to play that I want to watch him for any minute signs of distress. Why should he feel anything but childish freedom when he comes to play with my kids in the backyard to swing and shout and play as if that’s all he needs to do? Why shouldn’t what game he chooses next be the most important thing he thinks about?

And, the thought of my strong and beautiful friend, Kim, holding up her universe on her shoulders just breaks my heart into sharp little pieces. Isn’t it hard enough to raise three small kids, carve out a successful career, and generally keep things together without having to watch your best friend, your childhood sweetheart, your husband suffer?

And while we all know it is beautiful and important to appreciate each moment with family, my wish for my friends is the gift of negligence. I wish they could greedily gulp up the time they have together, swallowing it whole, without worrying how much is left.

I wish Josh could rest now and know that there would be a time when he’d have the energy and strength to play hard with his boys and chase after his wild and beautiful little girl.

I want to run with him again. I want to swear him to the secrecy of the run so that Kim and I could talk freely and have him laugh at our superficial banter.

I want our families to play together, to camp together, to laugh together without this huge asshole that is cancer always getting in the way of things.

I want him to laugh.

So with whatever you’ve got, whatever faith you believe in, please pray for my friends and send healthy, healing prayers to Josh…

this pic just makes me happy...

wordless wednesday

don't mess with HRH Princess Squishyface...

The other night the kids and I went over to Dan's house to hang out with him and the boys while the Kate was at a class. For some unexplainable reason, 6 kids + 2 adults is always an easier combination that 3 kids + 1 adult, so hauled ourselves over there.

Of course, the other draw of the eve was HRH Princess Squishyface, a.k.a. Baby Eva. The girls are so incredibly in love with her that they fight over who holds her first, longer, better and then last night after she pooped in Tali's arms (I wish I could've gotten a photo of Tali's expression) and we changed her diaper, we all laid on the ground with HRH around her blanket as she gurgled charmingly to us.

"I think Baby Eva needs some lipstick," Naomi said to me. "Can I give her some?"

"Let's hold off on that for a bit," I tell her.
"Oh, because her lips are so small it'd be hard to get it on right?"

"Yeah," I say. "That's exactly right."

Meanwhile, as she rubbed Eva's wrist with her finger in the most loving way I've ever seen, Tali looks over at me and says, "Forget the dog. Let's have a baby..."

Oh, my girl... How to tell her that she'll probably have neither for a long, long while?

party like it's 1999...

Last week B and I flew to San Francisco by ourselves for the weekend for the AIA conference, and we did not bring the kids.

We had adult time. Without kids. (I'm thinking that you're getting the picture, but wanted to make it very clear that we were kidless).

And being kidless in a city where we met, hanging out in the same neighborhoods we did, and even with the same friends we used to hang with (most kidless for the weekend, too!), we felt like we'd been transported back ten years. Oh, and we sort of acted like it, too.

We walked for hours and hours around town, running into the thousands of architects that had flooded the city (our friend Fiona even spotted one caressing a structural column at the Gap), browsed in bookstores, ate interesting foods that didn't involve noodles or hamburgers and we stayed out very, very late. I think we forgot that we weren't actually 26, though our exhaustion the next day reminded us fairly insistently. Boaz was pretty sure he had jetlag.

And the coolest thing thing was that B and I remembered how much fun we used to have with each other pre-kids. And we found out that we were still fun together, even though we hang out like that only once every three years or so. We may have to block out some more room on our calendars...

tali helps naomi plan a party...

wordless wednesday